The qualified Moms

The word ‘Mother’ in itself weighs too heavy.  For the world and for kids, this word means ‘qualified for every work; possess magical powers’. Think for a minute and you will agree with me. And this applies to all stages of a mother, whether mother to a toddler, to a young one or to a teenager.

Experience first

I am a mother to a 9-year-old girl and to a 4.5-year-old boy. My daughter is in 4th grade and the stress has just taken the shape of a seedling. The stress that is on me and not her. I was planning to write about this topic to actually de-stress myself when Amrita and Deepa gave out this prompt. All thanks to my girlfriends who understand my state of mind so clearly. There are many minute details that I have worked on while writing this post and want to share with you all. I hope they work in some or the other way for all of you.

Analyse your child

• Every child is different in himself/herself. Respect the fact and track that hour of the day when the child is most responsive to your teachings. At this time, the knowledge is embedded in the child’s brain for a longer period.
• First, let the child do his/her own favourite thing; playing video games or watching cartoon or siblings playing together that makes them happy and encouraged for listening to their mothers.
• Ask your child which topic does he/she wants to start with.
• Make a plan in advance that organises you and avoids the confusion for the child.
• I know this is tiring for a mother but it is a fact to be accepted that you need to give more breaks than lessons.
• The quality time, be it little, yields better results than forced teachings and scoldings.
• Keep changing the teaching pattern as the child grows so as to match with the child’s mood swings and demands.
• Bribe them for better results. Gift whenever they achieve something in order to encourage them. Appreciation is included in every human nature. On the contrary, take away a thing if they don’t listen.
• Be a friend to your child and not a teacher else child will miss the homely atmosphere and bonding.

I truly understand that all the above points are not applicable to all and not in every circumstance. I have experienced all these and observed that every situation is different from the previous one.

Who is actually stressed?

Is it the mother or the child?

I guess both the mother and the child. A mother is stressed because she wants her child to perform well. And the child gets stressed because he/she feels that they are being bounded too much during the exams times.

In my case, I don’t force my child to reach the 1st position but to at least perform the way she used to be. To make her understand the fact that when a child can perform well in regular classes then why not in exams?

• But the lesson I learnt is that the child has her/his own mental capacity and the desire to behave in a particular way. As the child grows, his/her interests also change and they love to excel in other areas and not just studies. and we should always respect this.
• You have to be physically present with your child even if she/he is studying by herself/himself. You can’t even reply to a comment on your blog through your mobile.
• I need to organise myself first; first, give her your time then she lets you blog!
• And lastly, I am also a child to my mother and I turn towards her only when I am disturbed because of my daughter’s behaviour. And yes, the therapy always works because your mother is the best gift that nature serves you with.

Linking this post with @misra_amrita and @Deepagandhi1 for #MMM